DEAR REAR
We have no words. To each their own.
GUIDE TO RACISM
We hope history doesn't repeat itself. Can't we all just get along?
INFANT CIRCUMCISION TRAINER
Dude, it's gotta a 5 year warranty.
UNICORN SPRAY
You must try the fruity booty scent. Get the f*%k outta my way, Stanley!!!
HOT LIPS
You so need this before going to the Jersey shore.
CHAMBONG
Used by the Real Housewives of Whatever. Stay classy Blondie.
55 GALLONS OF LUBE
Getting ready of the apocalypse? You've got your bunker, ready to eat meals, and 55 gallons of lube. Normal. Buy in bulk.
GIANT BLOW POP
The most logical, mathematical question is, how many licks does it take to get to the center? Take it to Spearmint Rhino.
DISEASES CAUSED MASTURBATION BOOK
Ain't that the truth. We suggest that you purchase some lotion at the same time and get busy reading.
BACK TO THE FUTURE FLUX CAPACITOR
The Flux Capacitor just keeps on giving. Remove your backseat and put this in.
GROW A GIRLFRIEND
Listen, if you ever decide to go your own way or just need a backup fun pocket, order one of these. For the good times and bad! She'll still ignore you HA HA!
|
BACK TO THE FUTURE HOVERBOARD
This much fun for less than $100? The movie was just on and good thing they had this otherwise Clara Clayton would not be alive!
SENIOR WOMAN POSTER
Choose wisely poster - this or death? $13,000 CABLE
This is what happens when you have too much money. Diamond braided cable, gold toilets, platinum cars. Where does it stop?
RANCH DRESSING SODA
No way can this can be good. Imagine what your pee would smell like during a drug test.
HIPSTER SHORTS
For the spiritual animal inside of you. Only works for men. Sorry ladies.
KAKA PANTS
This is absolutely disgusting. You mix this with unicorn scents and you'll be extremely popular.
BLING BLING ENGINE BUTTON
This is about as dumb as those eyelashes you see on some people's headlights. This is not customization, it's dumbization. Gold diggers delight.
VICTORY SOAP
If you want to smell like America, this is your soap. Ladies - DO NOT TOUCH as this will increase body hair immediately.
HOW TO BE BLACK
"Cash me outside, how bow dah"
BACK TO THE FUTURE MR. FUSION
After you install the Flux Capacitor, then mount this on the trunk.
MARY JANE IN A CAN
Please don't smoke this. Smell it, sniff it, lay it out and call the cops (CA cops don't care), pass it around, or just put it on the shelf. Sticky Icky... NOT.
|
UNICORN MEAT
The new spam and it's imported. Must we humans eat everything?!
GIANT GUMMY BEAR
Hello, diabetes. Nice to meet you. URANIUM ORE IN A CAN
Straight Outta Compton. Don't worry, it's totally natural. From section 13, part 40, beep-beep boop-boop.
TIGHTER VAG SPRAY
We all know there's no shortcuts in life. If you want something, you have to put the time in. BUT, this is different. No more Kegels. Spray this on and it's sealed for life! (Everything before BUT is usually negated).
BUCKET OF SCAT
So many different varieties. Cougar, skunk, dog, rabbit, fox, OH MY!
FACE SLIMMER
There's definitely some other applications this can be used for like pie eating contests among other things.
DONUT SOAP
Step 1 - get your buddy drunk. Step 2 - don't feed him until he goes nutz. Step 3 - put this in front of him. Step 4 - have 911 on speed dial.
REAL KOBE BEEF
Whaaaaaaaaaat?!?!?! Amazon sells Kobe Beef. You'll have to sell your family to buy it but totally worth it.
BREAKFAST SANDWICH MAKER
I hope this is non-stick because it'll be a nightmare to clean!
BACK TO THE FUTURE PLATES
Put this on your Kia!
FARTING BANK
You get the best of both worlds. You really do. You drop some bread and you get some hershey squirts without the smell. FYI - smelling farts cures Cancer.
|